What is one thing that we all have in common? I'm sure you have thought of a plethora of commonalities, but I'm sure there is one you haven't thought of yet.
We all compare ourselves with others!
It is easier than ever to be confronted with the perception of success and happiness. You know what I'm talking about. I'm sure you've scrolled through your Facebook feed to fine smiling faces, vacation photos, new job announcements, etc. It seemed harmless in the beginning. Check out your friend's posts so you can stay up to date, "Like" it, leave a comment, and sit back with a feeling of being connected. But oh how quickly it became a source of envy and rejection.
I think back to a time before Web 2.0 when I was unaware of the day to day of everyone's lives. I concentrated on those in my immediate circle and felt a sense of accomplishment throughout my day because the focus was on improving on yesterdays mistakes. The music side of my life certainly felt lest hectic. For the longest time I resisted using the social media platforms. However, as time has passes I have immersed myself in order to stay current and build relationships.
So what's the big deal?
All too often I have witnessed people becoming obsessed with these social media platforms to the extent that they feel as though they have failed. Why? Because there is an unreal comparison. As we mature throughout our lives we begin to take on unique paths in all facets of our journey. To make a comparison to someone else is irrelevant.
Apply this to the musicians life, in particular, mine. For me to make a comparison of myself with any other fellow musician is to bypass the multitude of differences that occur. If I notice that another musician has an opportunity that I don't have, and I think to myself, "That's not fair, why isn't me?", then I've disregarded the differences between us. For me, my focus will be on the fact that I have a different mindset and have made decisions with my life that has taken me to a different place. Trying to compare the life of a dad and husband to someone that is single, or someone that does not have kids has no benefit.
What about someone that has a similar lifestyle? Still doesn't matter. What is their day to day compared to mine? What is their backstory, their priorities in life?
There is only one person to compare yourself to. The you of yesterday!
Don't waste time with comparisons. You may find that you diminish the life you could have had because you never feel that you are ready or able enough. Just keep pushing ahead!
Does this sound cliche? Maybe. Regardless, it is a common trap and one that remains inevitable.
